Meditation is nothing more (or less) than emptying your mind of all distractions and focusing it on the here and now – your breath, the way your body feels, the feeling of the air around you, the sounds you can hear, any fragrances you can detect.  It’s clearing your mind out and anchoring yourself in the present moment in a way that reminds you that this is what’s real, that all else is merely the machinations of an active mind.  You can do it for a few minutes and on an as-needed basis, and you’ll definitely find it helpful – but even better is to develop a habit of meditating (in whatever way you like) twice a day.  Doing this regularly is like having a training program for your mind – as with your muscles, you get better at it and achieve greater benefit from meditation with regular practice.

Methods of Meditation

Here are four common and popular modalities of meditation.  Try them all to see what you like best!

Walking Meditation. A great meditation strategy for multi-taskers or anyone pressed for time, walking meditation allows you to mindfully combine two activities in one. While stationery, take a couple of cleansing breaths and then, as you begin to walk, focus on the sensation of putting each of your feet down – heel first, then settling your weight in and pushing off your toe as you take the next step – again and again and again. Synch your breathing with your steps.  You can do this while you stroll for relaxation or exercise, as you walk from a parking lot to your office or the supermarket, even as you go from one business meeting to another.

Mantra Meditation. A popular technique (and the one used in TM), this form of meditation utilizes the repetition of a single word or sound – over and over – as a way to push all other thoughts from your brain.  Some people like to choose a word or phrase that’s motivational or inspiring (“clean and clear” would be a good one) while others believe a meaningless sound (“ohm” is classic) is better because it carries no thought-provoking associations. Do this for a set period of time and begin and end with cleansing breaths.

Mindfulness Meditation. Mindfulness is the practice of bringing your full attention – thoughts and senses – to the present moment, slowing down and noticing all that is associated with it in a way that keeps your mind from wandering down unproductive and irrelevant paths. It’s not only cleansing in a meditative sense but mindfulness teaches us to experience life more fully, bringing greater appreciation of life’s small gifts.  Beginning with a deep, cleansing breath to clear your mind, go through each of your five senses one by one, fully experiencing what you see, hear, smell, taste and feel. Now, breathing in a slow but natural way, allow yourself to integrate the five senses and experience the whole moment. You can do this anywhere (even in a meeting!) and for however long you like.

Sleep hygiene is a term that refers to a set of healthy, sleep-promoting habits that you’ll incorporate into your life – everything from avoiding stimuli that will make it hard for you to fall asleep … to creating a restful environment in your bedroom … to setting yourself up with soothing physical and mental routines that help bring on sleep when it’s time.

Your goal is to get eight hours of sleep each night. Some people may need a bit less, others may need a bit more. You’ll know when you are getting sufficient sleep – you’ll feel rested and energetic.  Here are some suggestions on how to achieve that.

In the hours before bedtime …

• Avoid large meals; caffeinated foods (chocolate) and beverages (coffee, tea, soda); nicotine products (including e‑cigarettes and chewing tobacco) and intense exercise in the three or so hours before bedtime. If you have a sensitive digestive system, add spicy foods and anything else that triggers stomach upset to the to-be-avoided list.
• If you’re sensitive (and many people with addictions are) consider avoiding news programs, television shows and movies that may upset you.  Similarly, if you tend to fret over finances, don’t pay bills at night; if you have stressful relationships, make a special effort to keep the peace during the evening hours.
• Don’t engage in any vigorous physical activity (except sex – which is a good thing to do!)

Make your bedroom conducive to good sleep by …

• Creating a restful environment.  Make your bed in the morning, keep surfaces clear of clutter and don’t toss clothing on the floor.
• Adding small touches to make your room “special” to you. If you can afford to do so, this would be a good time to indulge yourself with new linens and a fresh, comfortable pillow.  Place a few photos or knick-knacks that remind you of loved ones or happy moments where you can see them.  Set up a system that allows you to enjoy soft music.
• Adjusting the environment to promote sleep.  Aim to keep the room dark (light-blocking curtains or shades aren’t necessarily expensive); cool (slightly chilly is much better than too warm) and quiet.  If you don’t find silence conducive to relaxation, download soothing music or even some meditations to which you can listen while you drift off to sleep.
• Keeping a notebook and pen (and a small light) at your bedside where you can jot down thoughts or worries that awaken you at night – this allows you to “dock the thought,” knowing you can deal with it in the morning.

As bedtime approaches …

• Establish a routine of doing a few relaxing things that make you feel good.  This is a good time to use your trackers to capture the way you’ve dealt with the day.  Mark its end by taking a warm bath, meditating, doing some simple yoga poses and deep breathing or writing in your journal.
• Consider creating a ritual to “let go” of negative experiences and associations from the day. Research studies show that writing things down on a piece of paper, tearing it into pieces and tossing it into the trash helps provide closure to upsetting incidents and angry feelings.
• Stop using electronic devices (including the television and computer or tablet), especially those that give off “blue light,” which the brain associates with alertness.

Other Steps You Can Take to Support Good Sleep

• Restrict your bed from all activities except sleep and sex.  Do not watch television, eat, use your computer, talk on the phone or even play games in or on your bed.
• Do not allow yourself to fall asleep anywhere except in your bed. Your goal is to train your body and brain to associate “bed” with “sleep.”  It’s okay to take short naps elsewhere.
• Don’t take long naps, no matter how tired you feel.
• Avoid going to bed hungry. Herbal tea, milk and/or some carbohydrates (a fiber-rich muffin, a banana or some popcorn are good choices) may help you feel full and sleepy.
• Take supplements that promote good sleep.  B vitamins, magnesium and potassium are good choices.

·       Incorporate vigorous exercise into your day – it will help tire you out.

To unlearn old beliefs that support erroneous choices and be- havior, you must first become aware of when your words and ac- tions are out of alignment. Examining these areas will point out when the choices you make aren’t going to promote what you say you want for your life. Once this awareness becomes part of your daily life, you’ll find yourself noticing when your actions aren’t directed at meeting your stated goals. For example, you may wake every morning saying, “I want to be healthier,” but if you stop for a 490-calorie café mocha on the way to work, you are work- ing against what you say you want for yourself. Another example would be if you hate your job — and you’re always trumpeting your longing for a job that will ignite your passion — but you do noth- ing about finding one.

We are also led astray by our hardwired behavior: the “fight- or-flight” reaction that arose early in human history. Even today, however, we often react without thinking about whether we want to fight or flee. Do you want to scream and yell at a partner when things don’t go your way? Should you run from a challenging situ- ation, or take the risk of failing to overcome it? You also need to unlearn your usual ways of handling stresses if they involve addic- tions that in the end do you harm.
I often ask my patients: “Are you in reaction?” Most do not grasp that they have a choice not to react. If they become aware of habitual errors, they can unlearn the same old impulsive reactions and instead respond thoughtfully.

To the aware person, spotting others in reaction is easy — say, when a fellow driver slips into road rage or someone in a coffee shop flies off the handle for a slight in service. During meltdown, passion rises and blindness descends.

While part of our temperament is genetic, much of what we call “temper” — the one we’re always losing — comes from where we have been and where we now find ourselves. While the genet- ics are more or less fixed, the underpinnings that urge us into thoughtless behavior are pliable. We can remake them to meet our freshly awakened purpose. We can recover. Sometimes suffering comes from a real event. If we suddenly lose a loved one, we know deep pain that is real and fitting. Other suffering, though, is tied to unrealistic evaluations we’ve made in our past. If our friend cancels plans for the Fourth of July, it doesn’t mean the whole world has turned against us, suddenly realizing our unworthiness. There’s no reason to feel hopeless and suicidal.

To become self-aware, we must see which response to an in- jury is too much and which is just. Excessive emotional response points to a need to examine the grip of the ego — that human part of us that makes up what spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle calls the pain-body . Old issues, unresolved from our past, often live in the pain-body and set the stage for oversensitivity. We must follow the roots of these beliefs and move toward uncovering the points of attachment that tie us to suffering.
If, in your childhood environment, you were repeatedly called “stupid,” it’s unlikely that as an adult, you’ll think of yourself as smart. If classmates tease that you “suck at sports,” it will surely bore a hole into your psyche, forming an attachment point to that continuing belief. Over time, you write your inner script; you play that part and read those lines, errors and all. We need to unlearn what we’ve learned so that we may heal the body-of-pain in our ego and move toward balance.